Repentance
by wexilctnaueij
Summary: Because, to miss someone whose heart and mind you broke, it is unfair; but miss them you still do. (Ryoma's voicemails to Atobe, set after Voicemail.)


#1

"You got the lyrics wrong. To that song that you sang. On that day when you were drunk. But I suppose you don't remember that you left me that last voicemail, drinking does that to you. It's okay. I don't expect you to sing properly when you're drunk. When have you ever? I remember when we got drunk together for the last time and ended up not fucking and just crying. I'll find you in Hyotei and show you your voicemail. Is it called showing?"

#2

"Dear Keigo, this is heartless of me, and you should stab me over and over, but I miss you, too."

#3

"Is this how you felt when I didn't reply to your voicemails? I wish I could tell you how sorry I am."

#4

"I thought about lying in your arms again. I want that safety again. I'm so selfish. I'm so selfish."

#5

"Thank you for talking to me today. Your lips are so tender. I never had sex with Fuji-senpai. I never fucked him. Those were just rumours spread by jealous admirers. You ruined me for anybody else. You. It's always been you. I don't want to let go of you. I'm so selfish. I'm not stroking your ego. I promise."

#6

"I wish you would stop crying whenever you see me. I know you try to hide the tears, but I've been around you too long to not notice."

#7

_"Ah-ah, nnh-_

_Mm, Keigo. Keigo... Keigo. (sharp inhale) Please. (drawn-out sigh) I've got- two fingers in my- ass right now, they're n-not nearly as thick as your cock, please, Keigo, please fuck me, fuck me open, please please please fuck me into your bed like I never left please I love you I love you ahh ah nh (heavy breathing) Keigo, Keigo, Kei-go-"_

#8

"I can't believe I sent that to you last night. Thanks for replaying it for me today. Guess I can get drunk, too. Between the two of us, the lightweight was always, unbelievably, you... but I suppose nine vodka shots inebriate anybody. Mada mada dane."

#9

"How was practice, Monkey King? You should pick up my calls more often."

#10

"I saw you, today. Why were you kissing Akutagawa? Aren't we back together?"

#11

"Miscommunication and all its follies. Thank you for telling me that we're only actually _friends_ and that I can't call you anymore. I promise I won't call you. I promise. Please delete my drunk sex voicemail. Please don't show it to anyone else. I know you're decent enough to not spread it."

* * *

_three months later_

* * *

#12

"How could you how many times do I have to apologize why didn't you come back you loved me Keigo you loved me you said you were too busy being mine to fall for somebody else you were crawling back to me you I love you please come back please come back I can't go on without you you're everything that I live for and I was a stupid brat when I broke you I was stupid and I didn't see what I had until you left-"

#13

"I'm sorry. I know I promised. And I know that those were just meaningless lyrics sung by a drunken man in his last day of love."

#14

"I won't be moving on. On the off-chance this cycle of falling in and out of love restarts and you come back. I'll be waiting."

#15

"I'm sorry. I won't call you again. I won't. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please, I'm sorry. Please don't call my mother. Please don't, I won't call you again. Don't tell her how pathetic I've become. I'm entering Grand Slams now. I'm going to win them all. I'm going to win over Tezuka-buchou. Maybe you and Akutagawa can watch me on TV getting all those trophies and medals and prize money."

* * *

_silence._

* * *

_one year later_

_silence._

* * *

_five years later_

_silence._

* * *

_ten years later_

* * *

#0

_We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again._

_We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again._

_(busy tone)_


End file.
